Monday November 26th 2007, 11:10 am

Four new reviews for you all! Thanks to everyone who helped me out with the design sites. If you're wondering why I have two reviews for Silver Cat Designs, it's because I received one from Mallory yesterday and this morning I received another from Ann. A little variety never hurt anyone, no? Anyway, enjoy the new reviews. I've gone over the 300 mark now!

Review 301: Connie of Grabaduck.Com

Ah, your collection of writing. There's a lot to get through here, so this would be the perfect time to move outside and read it all in the cool night air and the peace and quiet that it will surely bring. My mum's thrashing what sounds like death metal, and that's really not my cup of tea. Of course, I'll probably be bitten by a bloodthirsty deluge of mosquitos, but you're worth it honey. Judging from the way you've expressed yourself in your Girl section I know I'm in for a treat. Hey, I won't even deduct one QIS star per mosquito bite I receive!
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Review 300: Cat of Silver Cat Designs (2)

Deary, deary me. Why on earth are you getting reviewed? What is the point - if you’re not interested enough in your site to update it even once since 2004 then how can you be interested in a review? You need a kick up the ass, I hope this is doing the job well enough.
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Review 299: Cat of Silver Cat Designs (1)

The actual design is quite pretty, and I do happen to like it a lot --- Although I'm not too sure about the colours ... I realise this type of muted, calming colour scheme is popular with design sites, but I'm getting a slight 'washed out' look, mainly due to the yellowish/greenish text you've used. Perhaps you could try a dark brown or black to make it easier to read? Or perhaps lighten the greenish background colour?
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Review 298: Chiyuki-chan and Miko-chan of Etherie Designs

The header is simple and clean but it could have done better without the tacky flower brushes and border in the background. I can't even read the 'Dawning' part. And where did the hot pink from the 'D' for the title come from?! It doesn't scheme the layout very nicely. I don't like the color of the flower border contrasting on the background. It makes it look like throw up and dookie. How disgusting. I suggest you take out that border. It doesn't match the header at all.
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Sunday November 25th 2007, 7:21 pm

Site Update Sunday

The Birthday Book and Spider encounter pages have been updated, as has the queue - Darren's site Midnight Daydream has closed so at his request the site has been removed. 43 to go!

It's still relatively early in the morning and I'll probably be on the computer all afternoon, so stay tuned for further updates! Talk to you later.

Sorry, it was so hot that I ended up spending the afternoon at the beach! Whoops. Not to worry though, I'll continue with the review I'm writing later on this evening while James is watching all his American crime shows. In the meantime though, here's customary shit spoutin' blog for y'all.

<bitch> <whine> <moan>

I'd normally be eating dinner right now but since James is around my Mum's gone all experimental with her food. Tonight was pasta with sliced of cooked tomatoes and corn chucked into the fray, with a gigantic dollop of pink cream in the middle. I tried to eat around the vomitive dip but it was no use, and I ended up going into the bathroom to throw up since the sheer sight of it made me feel like retching. Wasn't a lot to throw up anyway seeing as all I've eaten today is a Moro bar. I'm so hungry, I might as well dress in rags and loiter in an alleyway begging for a bowl of cabbage water with a side order of stale bread.

So, I have another job interview tomorrow at an insurance place. Believe me, I have no interest whatsoever in this industry, the job role I think is just some run of the mill "Thank you, one moment please while I put you through to someone who can actually help you, since I clearly lack the intelligence to help you myself" kind of role. The job interview is in Wellington at 1pm, and I'm currently in Palmerston North which is 2 hours drive away. The person who's apparently going to be interviewing me is a chick so there'll be shit of course...especially as it's in the insurance industry and it's a well known fact that insurance people are insanely snobby wankoids from the Planet Wank. What's the point in using petrol to go down to Wellington to get chastised by a snob and not get the job anyway? Needless to say I probably won't turn up, and I'll turn my phone off because the employment agency will bombard my phone with angry voicemails that I won't even listen to anyway. Sure I'd actually listen to voicemails! Ha ha ha, he he he, and a couple of what the fucks, that's how we laugh the day away in the merry old land of PSGR.

We went to the beach today, and I was disappointed to notice the lack of toilet facilities. In fact, I didn't see any at all. The pain was severe, and the overwhelming need to urinate was truly great. I ended up going in the sand dunes, with James keeping watch to check if anyone was coming. I was seriously crouching down weeing for a good few minutes. It'd be nice if my bladder was more sturdy, all I have to do is have a few sips of drink and it's piddle piddle piddle. I know I've said this before, but I really wish I had a...won't say the C word..."diddle"...sometimes. I just love convenience is all. I went on a hike in the East Harbour Regional Park last week and weed in the bush, and long grasses were irritating the official PSGR Backside, since I had to squat since I'm a damn woman.

Ahh, that's better. I haven't bitched like this in ages! I guess some of you had been thinking I'd had a personality transplant or something seeing as I haven't done this in a while.

*scrolls down and reads previous blogs*

Oh ok, well that was a lie, I've whined about Wellington and BP recently.

I have some songs to add to my unofficial list of Dodgy Songs of All Time. The first being Tiptoe Through The Tulips by Tiny Tim. Download it and hear for yourself. 100% repulsion guaranteed. Second on the list is The Pingu Dance by David Hasselhoff. Why did he even bother...apparently he's hott in Germany though, but then again everyone's hott in Germany. And Japan. My Dingaling by Chuck Berry is also dodgy as hell. I have no idea how that track got on my iTunes. Now, although The Humpty Dance by Digital Underground is sorta dodgy, it's amusingly so. I listen to it for cheap giggles once or twice a year. (The lyrics are shite). A snippet:

I'm spunky. I like my oatmeal lumpy.
I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack
but sometimes I get ridiculous
I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish?

I'll get back to you with some additional titles next time I decide to pollute my ears via the shuffle function on iTunes.

Poooo. I'll go now, and continue with that review. I'll gross you out with my foul mouth another day, but in the meantime stay sexy everyone (you have to promise me), stay out of trouble, and umm...remember to turn off lights if you're not using that particular room. Let's all save power and care for the environment, pretending that it's not too late when it actually is. Being in denial rocks, and so do you for even visiting my desecrated, urine soaked haven of vulgarity that you may call "PSGR".

Don't forget to stay sexy now.

PS - Just checked my latest uniques on my extreme tracker and someone came here via searching "whores are people too myspace". The searcher came from the state of Idaho. Well, I be da ho in this place thank you very much...I don't even expect money for my services from you guys. I be da Special Ho.

PPS - I'm watching Are you smarter than a 10 year old in the background and the latest question was "How many lines of symmetry does a square have?", and the guy actually took a while to answer. God that show is CRAAAAP! Does Dominic Bowden study to have a cardboard personality or does it come naturally? Plus do all the kids have to fucking shout all the time? By the way, the laughter on the show is canned if you didn't already know.

</bitch></whine></moan>

Thursday November 22nd 2007, 3.00 pm

Hoping to get rhitarded with you

..yet I'd prefer it if you read this blog before making the necessary sexual advances or removing your clothes. I know it's hard, probably literally, but good things come to those who wait.

I too, am currently asking myself what the hell I'm going on about.

Anyway...first up, I have some hott news for y'all. PSGR has a brand spanking new fanlisting, thanks to the super fly, super high (if he's that way inclined) Nano. Woot woot! Sadly, the PSGR fanlisting I had last year is...how can I say this...I'm not in charge of it, but there appears to be a database problem that has not been fixed for several months, like half of the member count got wiped and now whenever someone joins, the oldest member in the list will get deleted as a result. Messy stuffs...anyway, never mind now because the new PSGR / Rhiannon fanlisting is now online and hopefully here to stay! Wanna join?

I'll probably be around here for the next few weeks, living in a Wellington-free state of mind. I've more or less given up the whole 'trying to find a job so that I can feel like I'm contributing to society even though I have issues with said society' thing. The agency I was with has mucked me around big time and there are no jobs going until January now. There's a good chance that James will be moving into a better position at his job that will pay just under $1000 a week, so if that happens then I might as well not bother trying for jobs I doubt I'd get anyway. I sometimes feel bad that James pays for everything but he says he doesn't mind, plus unlike me he has a career and he makes good money. In January he is going to be taking some insurance exams, and if he does well in them it'll mean that he can apply for some executive roles. This means big money! Most of it will be going on the car anyway...tints, twin exhausts, spoiler, blah blah blah. I'm particularly keen on getting tints, because people can be so nosey sometimes and I'm all for some increased privacy.

I had breakfast at an Italian cafe in Petone this morning, to the value of $40. Don't worry, I'm not a yuppie, we just had a free voucher. The scene was a little weird for me...kinda posh shite...I knew it would be, so I actually changed out of my pyjama pants and put on some baggy, holey Roxy jeans in honour of the event. (My pyjama pants are normal trackpants, so I can go out in them if I want and no one will know the difference). I had an "Elena Vegetarian Panini" for $9 (!!!), and was sorely disappointed. All it was was some white cheese (looked like...yeah...haha), tomatoes, and rockets, which are leaves pretty much. I got food all over the table and the floor as usual, and some posh people were staring at me! I may not have a platinum Amex card (although Nan does) but at least I know how to have fun with food. So I eat in a similar way to that of a farm animal...so? Bloody bogans...

Man, I'm so sick of all the fat free / 99.9% fat free foods around these days! Lite this, lite that! Tastes like shite! I was in Pak N Save Petone last night (a supermarket) and we were looking for a vinaigrette, but all we could see were 'lite' varieties. "Oh, it's fat free", I said. "Better put it back James, I can't be doing with this watered down fat free bullshit", and the guy that was near me turned around laughing and said "Too right!". Apart from the snobby Italian cafe, Petone (Pe-tony) is full of real people with real values. On the subject of values and dignified individuals, I'd like to tell you about a funny moment I had a couple of weeks ago, again at the Pak N Save in Petone. I had been suffering from uncontrollable bouts of gas for several hours, and as a result I was farting left right and centre as we perused the supermarket aisles. Discretion is important to me, so I made sure that I was subtle. However, at the checkout, I could no longer maintain this standard. Knowing James was right behind me and that he'd probably 'get the blame', I let rip. To my shock, this fart turned out to be incredibly loud - probably the loudest fart that has ever been released from the PSGR Ass. I started laughing, and a few seconds later the smell came through - boy, it reeked. By this time I had tears rolling down my face and I was beginning to get the stitch. I looked behind me and everyone who had been waiting behind James had moved to other checkouts instead! This made me laugh all the more. The whole area smelt of sulphur. I felt like a bit of a fool finding such amusement in all of this, I usually have a chuckle over extreme farts of mine but I've never behaved that way in public before. Oh well, since when have I cared what people think of me?

Well, that's enough gross shit for now, I'll be back on soon enough with some site updates and some new reviews. Bet you're all surprised I actually did one last weekend, huh? Hope to surprise you again soon.

Sunday November 18th 2007, 5:04 pm

Review 297: Brenda of Insanity Kills

Oh yeah, can't do the 'ho ho ho' thing anymore because it's not considered politically correct. (Santa's in some countries aren't permitted to say ho ho ho anymore because it also means slut / easy woman. ) Isn't it funny how so many people online call people "hoes"? Hoe = garden rake. Ho = woman who giveth pussy freely. There's a difference, people.

By the way, do you still smoke weed?
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Saturday November 17th 2007, 1:53 pm

Some site updates

Site updates so far today include: Extras (new WPR affiliate), Birthdays, Spider encounters, and a new page: The PSGR Directory of Haunted Places in New Zealand.

Just in - the official list of W2C winners! Click here to see who won and to collect your awards. Sorry if you didn't win - feel free to nab a participation award instead. Thanks again to everyone who participated in W2C 2007, hope you had fun!

Friday November 16th 2007, 10:45 pm

I love socks, please give me socks, I crave them

Whoaaa.....someone sounded upbeat in her last blog...what's with me saying I didn't mind Wellington? Umm no way dude, that city is a total dive! I guess I was feeling, like, positive or some shit...about a job opportunity...

Man, did that job interview ever go to pot. I might as well tell you that it was at BP - not at a service station, but in a contact centre managing accounts for customers. Anyway, I thought I'd read up some information about the company before I went to the interview and I discovered BP, aka Beyond Petroleum (formerly British Petroleum) is a hypocrite-clad corporation. They make out they're doing truckloads of shit for the environment when in reality they're just as bad if not worse than any other major petrol company out there. The girl who interviewed me had virtually no lip, and I could tell by the way she looked at me that she'd pretty much decided on me before I'd opened my mouth. I thought that since the role paid $1,300 a fortnight I'd go all out and wear my $350 Armani shirt, (big mistake buying that - it's nice but waaayy too expensive! I only had the money because I'd won $700 on the pokies the night before). She must have seen the discreet tag on the side and said "Armani, eh?" Taken aback by the possible hint of jealousy in her voice, I could only reply with "Ye-eeah". As expected, at the start of the interview she asked me what I knew about their company and I relayed some of the information I found out on Wikipedia, including:

The company was named one of the ten worst corporations in both 2001 and 2006 based on its environmental and human rights records.

Oh yeah, and:

Since branding itself an environmentally sound corporation in 1997, BP has been charged with burning polluted gases at its Ohio refinery (for which it was fined $1.7 million), and in July 2000 BP paid a $10 million fine to the EPA for its management of it's US refineries.[16] According to PIRG research, between January 1997 and March 1998, BP was responsible for 104 oil spills.[17] If one combines BP's own emissions with the emissions of the products it sells, then BP's emissions are greater than those of Central America, Canada or Britain.

Aaand...

On August 17, 2007, the Chicago Sun-Times urged readers to boycott BP gas stations: "At this point, the only clear message BP is sending is that it wants to have its cake and eat it too. BP executives want their company to be known as the greenest -- as suggested by its logo, meant to resemble a sunflower and show its commitment to the environment. But they also want to dump in our lakes. They can't have it both ways...

All of these facts have been obtained from the BP page on Wikipedia.

Obviously after this unexpected spiel from me, she asked why I wanted the job, so I said "I did want it but I can tell from the way you are with me that you're not going to give it to me whatever I do". I only wanted it so I could get a credit card to buy pairs of socks online and maybe a $271 NZD Juicy Couture tunic. I wasn't originally going to let it be known I knew the truth about their corporation because as you can imagine, $1,300 a fortnight isn't too shabby indeed. Not as much as James gets, but that would never be possible for me because I have no interest and barely any understanding of the insurance industry which is the area James works in. But, since the lady chose to hate on me from the getgo and I knew I had no chance, I thought why not? I was fucked from the start. Not sure I wanted to work for a pack o'hypocrites anyway! It appears, then, that even I must have standards. I was pretty much booted out twenty minutes after I went in, when the shebang was supposed to last an hour and a half, but whatever...s'cool. Like I want to work for you wankers anyway!! PSGR chooses Mobil everytime. Recognise.

Least I didn't escape out the fire exit like I did at that job interview in Sydney...remember that? Sometime last year. I went for a job interview and it turned out it only paid $9 an hour after tax, and I only go for jobs that pay $15 an hour minimum. I was in a tricky situation and I made out I was going to the toilet. Unfortunately, the lady escorted me to said throne, but then luckily I heard her walking away again. Thundermugsbirds are go! Scurry scurry scurry, for I was in a hurry hurry hurry. One fire exit. Fifteen flights of stairs. PSGR: The Great Escape - A story of deserved freedom. Check it out in a cinema near yeww!

Yeah right I would have got the job anyway though. I guess I'm all right without one, since I have no expenses and little desire for material possesions. Well, I already have my camera, iPod and computer that I have bought with my own money via saving, there's nothing else I can think of that I really want. Sure there's the items on my wishlist, but whatever - the clothing is nice but I can survive without it. I can't even think of anything I want for my birthday, which is a little over two weeks away on December 3rd. Socks, maybe? God I love socks. Big cocks socks, small socks, I don't care, it's all good as far as I'm concerned bro'. I have tonnes of socks! I especially like patterned socks - the gayer the better! You'd better believe I'm hinting here.

So what else...oh yeah, I've nearly finished making the W2C Awards. No, I'm not bullshitting, *sigh*, I really have been working on them and they will be up tomorrow. I haven't been at the computer all week so this is my first opportunity to make the actual awards. The participation awards were made last weekend but I obviously chose to wait til I'd made all the awards so I could put them together.

God, it feels like so long since I've posted an uber long blog. Let this blog continue! You want more incoherent ramblings? (Yes!) Cool, man.

Soooo...creamed rice and chamomile tea. You tried either of these? Not together, obviously. Gotta love creamed rice eh, especially Watties brand. The non-fat free one mind you - none of this 99.9% fat free watered down bullshit.

Chamomile tea can't be beat either. Put the dope away and sip on chamomile instead - it's totally relaxing and ideal before bed, especially if you have trouble getting to sleep at night.

How are you guys in lightning / thunderstorms? I was parked up in the car in Days Bay (Lower Hutt) a few nights ago during an intense storm - so typical for the Wellington / Greater Wellington area. I had to scream to James who was right next to me in order for him to even hear what I was saying, because the car was being pelted with hailstones, the rain was pissing down like anything, and the thunder and lightning was very frequent. Unfortunately I wasn't quick enough to grab a shot of forked lightning, but I did manage to take two regular pics via the timer and balancing the cam on the sidemirror - the first without lightning and the second with.

^ that's a token picture of New Zealand's official domestic and international carrier, Air New Zealand. I took this in a carpark near Gate D of the Wellington International Airport. This vantage point is ideal for takeoffs moreso than landings, as the planes' descent is unfortunately blocked off by the brown wooden fence.

Air NZ are aight. Cost me $230 to fly from Christchurch to Palmy, but they're still a decent carrier despite the price tag. You can fly from Chch to Wellington for like $60 on Pacific Blue and take the $22 train to Palmy - should have done that really, but I don't care for trains too much. What's up with those trainspotters? I would normally chuck in some spiteful dig like "Lame much", but I have a few colourful hobbies of my own as you know, so yeah...

Anyway, I'm out. Promise I'll be back with the W2C winners awards tomorrow, plus regular site updates such as spider encounters / birthdays etc. Thanks to all those who have contributed recently, you're all red hott and naturally sexy human beings. Your supremacy not only astounds me, but also causes envy.

((( MEGA LUFF )))

Friday November 9th 2007

Wellington rocks! (Sorta, kinda)

Well, I'm back in Palmerston North now after spending the past few days in New Zealand's capital, Wellington. Since Wellington is only two hours drive south of where I live, I have visited this city many, many times in the past. Every single time I have been in Wellington it has been pissing down with rain and I've virtually been blown to smithereens whenever I've tackled the mean city streets in order to do some 'shopping'.

Ah yes, shopping in Wellington. After spending half a year living in Sydney Australia, shopping in any New Zealand city is always a comedown, but since Wellington is the capital city I would have thought they'd have a little more to offer for the keen shoppers. Take a leaf from Auckland's book - nothing beats a stroll down the seemingly neverending shopping hotspot that is Queen Street. To me, Wellington fails to deliver as far as decent shops go. Westfield Queensgate isn't bad, but that's in Lower Hutt which is a city in the greater Wellington area. The only mall I can think of in the Wellington CBD itself is "James Smiths Corner", which is a few storeys high and consists of a boring ass shoe store (aren't they all?) a few Chinese tidbit stores and not much else. If shoes and trinkets and a shitload of empty stores are your thing then I guess James Smiths Corner is for you, but not me.

Over the past few days I've found plenty to do without even venturing into the CBD, save for a two hour long job interview. On Tuesday we checked out the botanic gardens which was massive. Hung out at Evans Bay on Wednesday and got badly sunburnt, and parked up down Oriental Parade yesterday where yet again I was roasted by the surprisingly hot sun. I say surprisingly because I've never experienced decent weather when I've been in Wellington before. Granted it's pretty much summer now, but in previous years I've been in Wellington in November / December and the weathers' still been shocking. This time around, the weathers' been anything but.

Because of this, and the fact that I've actually enjoyed myself has made me change my mind about the city. I, along with most New Zealanders, have bagged Wellington many times in the past. Wellington does generally have shit weather and an overload of artsy fartsy cultural / theatre people and that's not my kind of thing, but it's still possible to have a good time there.

As far as people (altercations with) are involved, I have little to report. I was in the car wiping my face with a St Ives face wipe and a girl was looking at me funny so I said "It's called a face wipe, bitch" but she didn't say anything back. They never do, strangely enough. God, why does everyone stare when you're applying a refresher towel to your face? Helloooo, oil and general build up o'dirt???!?!

Anyway, I'll be going back to Wellington soon because I may be getting a job there. It's a pity I don't know anyone who visits PSGR personally, otherwise I could meet up with them. I do get a few hits from Wellington but I have no idea who they are. I'm gagging to prove that I'm not the one with a problem when it comes to meeting up. As you've read in Online/Offline (Scribbles section) the first girl I met up with was from England and she did nothing but bitch and moan and be ungrateful, the second was a kiwi girl who went psycho after I politely declined her invitation to attend her weird church, and the third, well....where do I start. "Greg" was from England too and complained and whinged like nobodies business, and oh yeah...made me feel vulnerable in my own home, wouldn't take a hint and get away from me, made me feel scared to the point where I slept with a knife under my pillow and boarded my door up with a chest of drawers, blah blah blah. That shit was nearly a year ago, I can't believe it. It's funny, a couple of weeks ago I randomly started feeling bad about his inclusion in Online/Offline. I'm pretty sure that I was only feeling this way because I'd been looking through my stamp collection and wishing I had more cat stamps and knowing that I'd have trouble finding more since "Greg" was my stamp supplier. Not that I want to be friends again, I was just wishing that the situation had never happened. I did nothing wrong though, and a few seconds later I reminded myself of this fact and got over it.

Anyway, I'm out. Reviews coming this weekend with any luck!

Monday November 5th 2007, 5.21 pm

Review 296: Anna (and Bubbles) of Chemical Remix

I'm appreciating the creativity going on here. Your layout graphic clearly took some time to make and it shows, and I'm relieved to see that you haven't relied on celebrity images this time around. Good composition, good colour mixture too. Despite the fact that the graphic is rather 'busy', you've made your site title easily distinguishable - in fact it was the first thing I noticed when your layout loaded. It's 'in your face' so to speak, and in my opinion that's something positive.
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PS - I'm going to Wellington for a couple of days so there will most likely be no site updates until the weekend when I come back home. Unless I find a scungy internet cafe of course, in which case I'll either blog or hang out on Myspace. Is it a rule that all internet cafes have to be scummy and germ infested? Don't even get me started on the fact that most of them have locked the control panel so you can't change the screen resolution. Tres gay.

Friday November 2nd 2007, 11.14 am

Review 295: Bashar of Chasing-Cars

There's clearly some tit-on-tit action going on with the celebrity in your header image - who is she? Some people may find the kaleidoscopic boob on boob thing quite hott you know - I'm not one of those people, of course not - but all the same.
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HAI GUIZ! (12.25 am)

Wassssup? I've been working on a review but it's a bitch of a site in terms of content so I'll be finishing it off tomorrow instead.

I've been meaning to remind you all that about a month ago I got a new Myspace account. On impulse I deleted the last one and ended up creating a new account less than 24 hours later. Story of my life. I don't really enjoy Myspace all that much but I reminded myself that it is a great way to keep in touch with people - especially since I'm so slack with replying to emails. Myspace = easier.

If you'd care to add me again at my 'new' account? I promise I won't delete it this time.

I'll be on sometime in the late morning / early afternoon with the new review, so stay tuned for that. Goodnight!

Wednesday 31st October 2007, 10.41PM

Well then

New layout, as you can see. Typically, it isn't displaying correctly on IE6 - the logo on the left is completely housed in the header background (the stripes) and it's not meant to be, it's supposed to have 3/4's blue striped background and 1/4 grey at the bottom. I'll attempt to fix this problem shortly, IE 6ers.

Save for the Internet Police blog yesterday, I haven't been active on the site at all - apologies for that. The majority of my weekend was spent away from the computer as usual, and on Monday / Tuesday it was quite hot so I pretty much spent most of the day outside. Halloween tonight...not that we really celebrate it here in New Zealand. Every couple of years we get the occasional sole door knock from kids wanting candy and, like most people here, we pretend we're not home!

PS - Posts from this month will be archived shortly, plus the winners of W2C 2007 will be announced as soon as 500 and something votes are counted and the awards have been made. Please allow a couple of days for this, cheers.